Wednesday, January 13, 2016

DEFINING YOURSELF IN A DEPENDENT RELATIONSHIP




    We've all been in the position at one point or another where we have depended on other people for our personal happiness. We tell ourselves that if others treat us right, love us more or tend our emotional needs we will be truly happy. But then when they fail us, or refuse to do the things we want them to... we crash emotionally and feel devastated inside. We tell ourselves that we need these other people so badly, that we could never find happiness outside of their influence. But the truth is, we can never be truly happy until we are stable within ourselves and have peace of mind. 

    To do this, we need to ask ourselves; 1. Who am I? 2. What do I really want? 3. What excites me in life and makes me feel joyous? You have to ask yourself these questions and begin to define yourself outside the context of the relationship. You're answers to these questions cannot include the other person or people whatsoever. Finding "YOURSELF" is the most important thing here. The next thing you need to do is find support. This may be through friends or a trusted spiritual teacher; but if another person cannot be found for a support partner, try self counseling with Runes, the Tarot or any other oracle deck that speaks to you. Your connection with Spirit is very important in this situation. 

    Spirit accepts you as you are and will always echo back to you that which is your true nature. Hence, your spiritual path will be your greatest strength. You are not powerless, you are not worthless or trapped. You are not someone else's captive and your life is not contained in a small box. You just need to take back your power by finding out who you really are within. The other people around you are there to compliment your life, not to BE your life. And by that I mean, that they cannot live your life for you, nor is your happiness dependent upon their actions or lack thereof. You need to take your focus off of them and put it on yourself. You are the only one who can define you... and when you do that, you will know how to make yourself happy. Your life is not a pie that you can slice into pieces and place into the hands of others; it is solely yours to live. So begin living it today by finding out who you are and what YOU truly want.


 

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